An Armenian Wishlist for Anonymous

Garen Yegparian
Garen Yegparian

Garen Yegparian

BY GAREN YEGPARIAN

As you probably know, “Anonymous” is an ultra-secretive, underground, very loosely “organized” group of hackers whose targets serve some societal utility. These targets have ranged from governments (including Turkey’s), to corporations, to religious entities with questionable functions, and even ISIS. They might disrupt websites or expose information (they supported Wikileaks). A few of their “members” were arrested a few years ago, but they still seem to be out there and active. So, I thought I’d act like a kid writing a letter to Anonymous Santa, with things that would help Armenians, the best “presents” being listed first. Some wishes overlap, but hey, I’m a kid writing Santa…

1- The best gift of data and knowledge we could get are the names of all those whose “ancestry code” in Turkey is a 2. You’ll remember that about three years ago, we learned, quite by accident, because of a bureaucratic mixup, that Turkey had tracked the ancestry of Greeks (1s), Armenians (2s), Jews (3s), Syriacs (4s), other non-Moslems (5s) ever since the Lausanne Treaty of 1923. Imagine the outreach and restoration that could be done with this data!

2- A full listing of all the hiding places of all the money squirreled away by all the kleptocrats ruling Armenia would provide the ammunition to return those funds to where they belong, the government of the Republic of Armenia. Better yet, it could be used to pay off the roughly $5 billion in debt the country has amassed!

3- All the records of all the wealth and property stolen from Armenians by the Turkish government during the Genocide. This data was tallied at the time and some of it has been recovered by researchers. But imagine it in one massive data-dump, assuming these records have been scanned or digitized (which is unlikely and is the flaw in many of these wishes).

4- Late-Ottoman era archives, if when/digitized. And, not just governmental, but party or other quasi-governmental entities, too.

5- All secret communications between Ankara and its lobbyists, coopted/cooperative groups (ADL, defense industry, etc.), along with Turkish groups in the U.S. and elsewhere,

6- The same as #2, but for Azerbaijan, so the funds could be used to rebuild Artsakh which has still not fully recovered from Azerbaijan’s wanton destruction in the early 1990s, not to mention the more recent ruin of the four-day-war.

7- From Azerbaijan, any information relating to the mistreatment of and policy towards the country’s minorities (Lezgis, Tats, Talysh, etc.).

8- A comprehensive listing of all the bogus “privatization” that occurred in the Republic of Armenia after the breakup of the USSR.

9- Any Georgian secret documents about government policy towards Armenians.

10- Lists of where the Gulen movement entities, from schools, to non-profits and supporting businesses, along with the names of those running them.

11- Heck, while we’re at it, let’s be greedy! Imagine getting access to ALL of MIT’s (the Turkish intelligence agency) files and what could be done with that data!

Go ahead! Feel free to add more wishes! Let’s get some laughs out of this! We might even come up with ideas that can be pursued through traditional means.

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4 Comments

  1. Ara said:

    This really has nothing to do with this article, but I was wondering if the government of Armenia ever thought of giving asylum to Assyrians and yezidis from Iraq and Syria. Armenia needs people and these people share similar fates of Armenians and we should welcome them also.

  2. Perouz said:

    Garen;

    Re: #3
    On June 30, 1915, the 890 remaining women and children in the caravan going from Oghnout to Diyarbakir were questioned in the village of Alou, by gendarmes sent from Palou. Information about the occupations of their men, how much money they had, and the number of livestock and property they owned was all recorded. The women were then beaten and pillaged. One woman, the daughter-in-law of a priest, was killed because she had no money. This caravan had started out 3 days earlier with 970 women and children.
    Who are the researchers you refer to in your article who are documenting this information? I also have information regarding money from the Church.
    Perouz

  3. Anonymous said:

    Your wish list has been received. While we can’t make any promises, we’ll keep this article in our files for future reference.

    SINCERELY — Anonymous

  4. Onjig said:

    Well, getting payment for the factory of my Grandfather is a thought, but what about Armenia, Western Armenia, in which it was built. The Turk is going to give nothing of the stolen wealth, the modern turk is digging up the graves of our ancestors for bits of gold or silver buried with them.
    They deny the murder of our families and friends, of our nation and regret the few who they missed killing.

    I have a different wish list!

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