BY REV. DR. VAHAN H. TOOTIKIAN
February 14th is Valentine’s Day, a day to celebrate love and romance. Who exactly was Valentine?
There are several legends about Valentine. According to one tradition, Valentine was a wealthy young Christian gentleman who lived in the third century A. D. He was in love and soon to be married to a beautiful young lady. At that time, the emperor of Rome declared all Christians to be illegal citizens, guilty of treason. All they had to do to retain citizenship was to say, “Caesar is Lord,” but all they would say was, “Jesus is Lord.” As a professing Christian, Valentine was arrested and imprisoned.
While in jail, Valentine wrote passionate love letters to his sweetheart, assuring her of his love and determination to marry her and live in blissful happiness.
But it was not to be. On February 14, 269, young Valentine was executed, put to death because he would not renounce allegiance to Jesus Christ. That is one of several legends about this romantic day.
The Roman Catholic Church declared February 14th the Feast of St. Valentine. It has declared two different men named Valentine to be saints: one, a priest who was martyred by Emperor Claudius and buried on the Flaminian Way; the other, a bishop of Interamna, executed in Rome for his faith, whose remains were later taken back to Terni. There is evidence to corroborate these stories, and to indicate that both men were dedicated to serving others in the name of Jesus. And both paid with their lives!
Valentine’s Day may, on the other hand, be just a conversion of the pagan festival of Lupercalio, which was celebrated by the Roman people in mid-February.
Whatever the origin, Valentine’s Day is a celebration of love and romance, a day to recognize that even in an age and society of unfairness, unfulfilled dreams, loneliness and alienation, there is still love.
Have you heard about the world’s longest love letter? In 1875, a painter in Paris by the name of Marcel de Leclure wrote it to Magdalene de Villalore. It contained just three words, “I love you,” 1,875,000 (one million, eight hundred seventy-five thousand) times! He did not write the words himself; he hired a scribe. But he didn’t just say, “Write, ‘I love you’ this many times.” He actually dictated the words each time. So all in all, the phrase was uttered orally and in writing 1,875,000 times! I hope they subsequently lived happily ever after!
What is love? How would you define love? We really can’t. Yet everyone knows what it is. On one hand, love is so simple, so elementary, and so universal. On the other hand, it is so complex, so complicated.
Love involves the mind, body and spirit. It includes the warm and fuzzy feeling of holding hands with someone, the encouragement of someone’s hand on a shoulder, a simple card in the mail, a telephone call. But love is more than an emotion.
As we know, there are different types of love. There is love and affection between friends. That’s true friendship. There is love between lovers, and that’s romantic love. And there is an unconditional love that Jesus models for us; that is called agape love. All manifestations of love are beautiful—love between friends, love between lovers, parental love, and love of country—but without agape love, they are incomplete. It is agape love—selfless, sacrificial, generous and unconditional love—that really makes all of our relationships most meaningful.
The love God gives us, and the love He wants us to give others, is radically different. God loves us not because of anything we want to do for Him. He loves us unconditionally. If you have children, you will understand this kind of love. Parents love their children not because of what their children do for them, but simply because they are theirs. Agape is unconditional and sacrificial love. It deeply desires everything that is good for the other person. This is why parents make sacrifices for their children. They lay down their lives for the good of their children. This is the kind of love Jesus displayed by dying for us on the cross. This is the kind of love God gives us and requires of us.
Speaking of love, Jesus gave us what is called the Great Commandment, He said, “Love your God with all your heart, with all your soul and with all your mind, and love your neighbor as yourself” (Matt. 22:37-38). Notice this is a commandment; it’s not a suggestion or a recommendation. This is more than a feeling and emotional expression. This is a conscious commitment on the part of the person who loves. This commandment applies to all of life’s relationships. It applies to parental love, romantic love, love between friends and even love towards enemies.
The question may be asked: How can we show our love to others?
We can show our love through verbal communication, verbal declaration of love. Husbands and wives should take the time and have the courage to look each other in the eye and say, “I love you!” Parents and children, loved ones, and friends should seize every opportunity to do the same thing.
But we should go beyond mere words, for love is more than words; it is a matter of attitude and action. The important thing is not words or feelings, but deeds. A fond affection is not enough, especially when some people do not have outgoing, extrovert, and expressive temperaments to express their feelings. Their genuine love can be expressed in thoughtful, kind, and giving attitudes and actions. Real love is not what we feel or what we say, but what we do. For love is a way of living at home, school, work, play, church, or where we happen to be.
Rev. Dr. Vahan H. Tootikian is the Minister Emeritus of the Armenian Congregational Church of Greater Detroit and the Executive Director of the Armenian Evangelical World Council.
